Is that chicken crackling atop my rice rolls? Why yes, yes it is.

I can trace both a passion for Chinese food and a tendency toward dietary excess to my old man, who was of the more is more school of cooking and eating. Oh Craig Claiborne’s recipe calls for a teaspoon of preserved black beans? I’ll put three it’ll be better, right? Wrong! Which brings me to the subject of today’s post, a calorific, cholesterol-laden little number I call hung jiang chang fen ji pi, or mixed sauce rice rolls with crispy chicken skin.

I thought it was a good idea, I really did.

The mixed sauce rice rolls—chewy cylinders of rice dough lashed with sweet soy, peanut sauce, and sesame seeds—from Noodle Village So Good are one of my favorite snacks in Flushing’s New World Mall. I thought they’d be even better strewn with some crispy fried chicken skin from Taiwanese snack stall, Tea Twitter.  On its own the Chinese (OK Taiwanese) chicken chicharron is grand: salty, crunchy and fatty.

Crumbling chicken chicharron atop the rice rolls was an exercise in excess that I will not be repeating anytime soon. The only gussying up the rice rolls ever need is a bit of hot sauce. The Chinese garbage plate I created is the type of dish that a restaurateur friend likes to say should be garnished with a crumbling of a Statin drug.